The ONE thing

 I will never stop asking this. When is the magical unicorn day this mass hysteria stops? 

15 days turned into 30 that now turned into almost 6 months of constant lies & manipulation.  

Do people not see that the haters of America have found the ONE thing that people are willing to roll with to lose freedoms?? They’ve been looking for that THING since America was founded. 

This is it. Anyone dissenting is called selfish because this is about safety.  They found the ONE thing that cancelled EASTER Ecclesia for almost everyone. They found the thing to start attacking the CHURCH! And they are doing it right out in the open. And most people are okay with it because it’s about safety. Think about it, many states are dictating how many people can attend church! In America, not everyone can attend church that wants to and that is despicable.

And for some reason because it’s about health, no one sees that it’s the same exact tactics as any other slow take over/fade into communism. Because they’ve manipulated the masses with “forced” well visits and false medical doctrine for decades. They have slowly made Americans believe that doctors are all FOR you & your health. All Doctors know more than other people about health. They have ALL the answers. It is a religion. And any doctor who has ideas that differ from the collective, is silenced  

Health Experts would never walk into the Oval Office and LIE about numbers and death in order to change America fundamentally! Oh no they are all caring and full of heart and love for all life and they don’t have any agendas. They’d never try and gain more power or help their friends. Oh no. They wouldn’t follow their own political ideologies ABOVE the well being of millions of Americans. They wouldn’t force mass shutdowns and ignore the suicides, substance abuse and depression. They wouldn’t stand in front of the American people and spit lies in order to get their power and money back to their elite friends. People don’t like power or control right? And people definitely don’t work together to take over countries and control the masses, right? 

Do you love America for giving us our God given rights? There’s no where else we can have them.

Also, have you ever heard the stories of Christians in other countries meeting even when it’s illegal? Have you been proud of those Christians for doing what is right? If you have, this is the same exact situation. But remember they found the ONE thing that most people can get behind because of their ingrained, medical belief system/doctrine.

Do you watch the stories of immigrants who fled COMMUNISM and feel anything? Feel moved or start weeping? Because I do. Maximo Alvarez said it best “there’s no where else to go”. Imagine the PTSD this is triggering in any immigrant who actually watched their country erode into communism. 

My Nonna as a young girl fled with Nuns to North Africa to escape the Nazi’s in Italy. She watched her brother lose his life by stepping on a bomb. She always says, when she hears a politician speak about redistributing wealth or higher taxes or welfare etc, and says, “that’s communist. They want control.”

Just because this isn’t about removing a people group from their homes and carting them off, this is the SAME beginning threats. Think about what is happening and really play it out in your mind. They have task forces to check for mask dissenters. But again, because it’s about safety and health, people refuse to see the signs. 

Please please Go learn about how the other countries changed. And please learn the difference between a Constitutional Republic & a Democracy. Because I sure as heck don’t want to live in a democracy - which is one step closer to socialism/communism.

We are either free or we are not. And I choose freedom. A freedom given to us by God that others died to protect. Imagine what they would say if they knew we CLOSED our churches! Imagine what they’d say if they saw us ignoring the communism that is creeping in. Imagine what they’d say if they saw people so divided over this topic of FREEDOM. 

NOW IS WHEN WE STAND. 

IF NOT NOW, THEN WHEN?

Hind sight // God's plan

Joseph's story in the Bible is one of my favorites. Joseph must've been so scared to be sold into slavery. He must have been sad and angry many times through out his life. Because other people a used their power and hurt him.

It reminds me that hind sight is a funny thing. As we are in the midst of something painful, sad, confusing or frustrating (or all of the above) it's easy to forget about God. Or it's easy to think he's forgotten me. But that's our flesh and that's me attributing human characteristics to God. People let us down. People forget us. But God. God does not. He just doesn't. And when we look back after the hard time has passed, if we've been following God through it, we can see all the beauty he revealed. We can look back and see His hand was over us the entire time. There was a point to the suffering. And there was a purpose for the pain. It molds us and changes us and stretches us to new depths. His plan and His will for my life is good. 

My job.

How we treat our kids is most important. As the world systematically crushes the hearts of children, it's our job as parents to teach & show our children that God is for them. 

The above statement came to me as I watched my son wave and smile at a passerby who didn't return the gesture. And this isn't the first time I've observed this type of interaction. If we are out in public, it happens often. Usually, I say, "are you saying hi Elijah?"  Then and only then do the people change their facial expressions from blank/annoyed. And they give a smile or a wave and maybe just maybe say hello. 

It hit me that it's my job as Elijah's mother (and my husband's) to show him that he's special. And that being friendly is always the right thing to do. 

We must model this behavior for him. Because clearly the world and the people living in it, will not always be as kind. But we have to press on and continue to be kind without expecting anything in return. 

I can see that it would be easy to get discouraged as a child. Especially one who is just learning to communicate. He tries to and people just stare at him like he's an alien. Seriously, people react more to puppies and kittens then they do to my son! 

And maybe it's the area in which we live. I sure hope so. I hope people are more friendly in less harsh of climates. But that isn't where we live. We live here. Here in MN where people can be very cold. And people tend to be antisocial unless they are drunk. 

But no matter what. It's still my job to impart God's love to my child(ren). 

Start children off on the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it.

Proverbs 22:6 

Always

I will never be done sharing how Jesus has changed me. And made me new. And taken away the guilt and pain and shame of my past. And how the joy of The Lord has filled my heart. 

I was never trying to fight. 

Simply spreading hope to anyone who wants it.

But I've put in the effort. The daily renewing of my mind. Daily finding new ways to see beauty. 

I also had to make choices. Stop drinking and smoking and doing drugs and openly and blatantly sinning and being vulgar and gross. 

All my choices lead me down a dark path. And then by God's grace, I couldn't take it anymore and I chose to let God have my heart instead of the world. 

Those choices and the knowledge of knowing that every day is a new day and Jesus loves and forgives me when I stumble, all of it together has lead me to here and now. 

It isn't something that magically happened over night. And it wasn't by chance. I sought hard and still do. 

I chose to stop the party life and choose to go to church and praise God. And listen to Bible teachers. And truly repent and let my heart be softened. 

It isn't something I take lightly. 

But it is something, I love sharing. And I love helping other people find a relationship with Jesus. It's what life is all about.

There is always hope.

READ THIS, AND TELL ME THERE IS NO HOPE FOR PEOPLE BATTLING DEPRESSION----

ROMANS 8:1-39

Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit who gives life has set you free from the law of sin and death. For what the law was powerless to do because it was weakened by the flesh, God did by sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh to be a sin offering. And so he condemned sin in the flesh, in order that the righteous requirement of the law might be fully met in us, who do not live according to the flesh but according to the Spirit. Those who live according to the flesh have their minds set on what the flesh desires; but those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires. The mind governed by the flesh is death, but the mind governed by the Spirit is life and peace. The mind governed by the flesh is hostile to God; it does not submit to God’s law, nor can it do so. Those who are in the realm of the flesh cannot please God. You, however, are not in the realm of the flesh but are in the realm of the Spirit, if indeed the Spirit of God lives in you. And if anyone does not have the Spirit of Christ, they do not belong to Christ. But if Christ is in you, then even though your body is subject to death because of sin, the Spirit gives life because of righteousness. And if the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead is living in you, he who raised Christ from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies because of his Spirit who lives in you. Therefore, brothers and sisters, we have an obligation—but it is not to the flesh, to live according to it. For if you live according to the flesh, you will die; but if by the Spirit you put to death the misdeeds of the body, you will live. For those who are led by the Spirit of God are the children of God. The Spirit you received does not make you slaves, so that you live in fear again; rather, the Spirit you received brought about your adoption to sonship. And by him we cry, “Abba, Father.” The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God’s children. Now if we are children, then we are heirs—heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory. I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us. For the creation waits in eager expectation for the children of God to be revealed. For the creation was subjected to frustration, not by its own choice, but by the will of the one who subjected it, in hope that the creation itself will be liberated from its bondage to decay and brought into the freedom and glory of the children of God. We know that the whole creation has been groaning as in the pains of childbirth right up to the present time. Not only so, but we ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for our adoption to sonship, the redemption of our bodies. For in this hope we were saved. But hope that is seen is no hope at all. Who hopes for what they already have? But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently. In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans. And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for God’s people in accordance with the will of God. And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers and sisters. And those he predestined, he also called; those he called, he also justified; those he justified, he also glorified. What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies. Who then is the one who condemns? No one. Christ Jesus who died—more than that, who was raised to life—is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us. Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? As it is written: “For your sake we face death all day long; we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered.” No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. (Romans 8:1-39 NIV)

Fight

Tragic events should make us sit back and take stock of our lives. 

They should make us pull our blinders off and really look around.

 Maybe, we should be nice to the cashier at Walmart or smile at a toddler as he waves violently and smiles and says hi hi hi. 

Or I don't know, maybe look at the people around us and take the grimaced off of our faces. 

When we bump into someone, we should say excuse me. We should stop driving with such intense rage. 

As we go about our day to day lives, we should be paying attention for every opportunity to share God's love in whatever way, shape or form we can. Life is short and we take it for granted. We also walk around ignoring the fact that their is an evil one lurking, waiting in the darkness. And he wants us to stay in our selfish comfort zone. He wants us to ignore the people around us. He wants hurting people to feel isolated. He wants to trick them into thinking that they aren't loved and that death is the answer. Then he sits back and laughs as everyone left behind is in pain. And he feels like he has accomplished something great. But those of us who have Satans number, those of us who know his tricks, we can be the light. Darkness must flee in the presence of light.  We can continue to wage war against evil. We can love our neighbors and be kind to our enemies. And we can make Satan quiver and keep his demons in hell where they belong. 

Instead of wishing peace to someone who is no longer breathing, we should be bringing peace to our communities. We should be praying for the people still on earth who are broken. We should be embracing one another. We should be claiming our cities in Jesus' name. We should be blessing our fellow man. 

We should fight for life. 

Sleep

Our journey 

This topic is a minefield. That much I know is true. 

But now that we have made it past the first year & sleep is attainable a lot more often these days, I thought I would write out some of my findings and beliefs about sleep. 

Proverbs 3:24

If you lie down, you will not be afraid; when you lie down, your sleep will be sweet.

Psalm 4:8 

In peace I will both lie down and sleep; for you alone, O Lord, make me dwell in safety.

There is so much pressure to get your baby to be a "good sleeper". This pressure starts almost immediately after you give birth. At least it did for me. Usually, the very first question someone asks me about our son is something similar to, "Is he a good sleeper?" 

To which I always reply "Yes, yes he is". Because, frankly, it isn't any of their business how our child sleeps. It is just the question people ask to compare and throw advice at new mothers. It is a parenting grading scale. Because clearly, if your child isn't sleeping properly, you are a huge failure as a parent. Right? 

Wrong!

What is a good sleeper anyways? 

A baby who sleeps all night? 

A baby who goes to bed easily? 

A baby who sleeps 10 -12 hours straight? 

I have found that in our culture, it is all of the above. And to that notion, I roll my eyes and scoff. Because I refuse to label my child. I won't do it. I refuse to say

 "he always _____"

 "he never ______"

 "he is a bad sleeper" etc. 

As soon as we start labeling, those labels seep into the child's identity. And it becomes part of who they are. We continuously repeat negative phrases as if they are absolutes. When logically, humans are fluid. Meaning that if we are searching and learning and striving for change & maturity, we do change. We can grow mentally. 

Children are constantly changing. Isn't that why childhood is so precious? Because it is so short? So why do we expect consistency when their little bodies are growing so rapidly? It is said that a newborn grows, on average, a millimeter a DAY! Their neurons and synapses are firing so rapidly! And their tiny bodies grow and grow! 

With children comes a type of beautiful, messy chaos full of love. At least, that is how I see it. I see them as people. People that do NOT need a perfected strict schedule. With tight schedules, there often is no room for fun or spontaneity. And children need love, fun, guidance, and discipline. But above all they need love. They need to feel secure and safe before they can ever truly understand love. Each child has a specific way they need to be loved. Just as adults have love languages, children do as well. 

Since, I am staying home to raise our child(ren), K left it up to me to figure out what to do with E in regards to sleep. As far as sleep scheduling or non-scheduling is concerned, I have prayed and sought out all of the information on sleep that I could find. And after compiling it all together, my conclusion was, attachment parenting is natural. Any other type of parenting doesn't appear to meet a child's needs on all levels. And in time I trusted the process and I knew Elijah would sleep through the night when his body was ready. Babies do not have the same sleep patterns as adults. 

Go figure? Who knew! (I jest)

His body will find it's own circadian rhythm {more info}. Each child is different. To expect babies to sleep through the night is cruel. It is putting expectations on them that aren't healthy; Especially, separate of breastmilk. A mother's milk has sleep inducing hormones in it. And those hormones increase in relation to the mother's circadian rhythm (night and day). 

Sure, we can force sleep to happen and most children will adapt and succumb to the sleep regimen. And then we sit back and say how good of a sleeper they are, FINALLY! As if, until that glorious moment they were failing as a human being and our child. They were causing us stress. 

How dare they do that? How dare our brand new child be a lot of work. 

After being on the planet for less than a month we are already comparing them to other babies, and expecting them to not need us. Personally, I like that Elijah needs me. I enjoy every moment he needs reassurance. The more I researched, I found that confidence and security go hand in hand with how a child is allowed to sleep. We are mammals and we need close contact. From the moment we are born we crave it. And as parents, if we don't meet that emotional need for our infants, the child misses out. Babies do have feelings. How do we think a child feels if they are left alone in a crib to cry? Is it building trust??

No. It can create negative lasting effects. These effects can range from behavioral issues to anxiety to depression to desperation for love. It is important that we let our children attach to us.

We sit here and we speak for our babies, saying how much they like what we force them to do, in regards to sleep. Obviously they can't communicate and tell us their feelings. Instead they whine or pout or in some cases they internalize the emotions until they are older and then LOOKOUT. All because this American way of life calls for perfect sleep and perfect schedules. 

It is nonsense to expect each newborn to fit into a little tiny made up box. Was that box created with the child's emotions, growth, health or brain development in mind? 

No, it was created because of our busy lives. And from the moment a child is born, they are expected to adapt to this insane American lifestyle. A lifestyle that is go go go! And our precious sleep is very important because we have so much to do! 

It is so easy to get sucked in to the notion that if my child isn't sleeping through the night by 6 months old, I am doing everything wrong. But it isn't natural for them to sleep all night. 

And yes, waiting for E's body to regulate itself has come with sacrifices. K goes to bed when he needs to and I go to bed when Elijah gets sleepy. 

I could sit and fight and fight for control. I could make myself crazy trying to force our child to bed. Or, I could play & tickle & laugh & wrestle and get him good and tired. And then his body finds it's own rhythm. It isn't exactly the same every day. But neither is our growing son. 

Sometimes I can tell, his brain is moving so fast, his body struggles to calm down. Which means, I am not going to force sleep on him. Because it would be a form of torture. I stimulate his brain and give him the attention and affection he is craving. 

Incorporating essential oils into our night time "routine" is helpful. But those oils alone don't do the trick, they help after a full day of activity & night time breast feeding. 

If I get in a frenzy about sleep, which I have, then Elijah struggles to sleep. I don't even have to externalize my worries, even though, that is nearly impossible. Especially, when it comes to anxieties and worries that shouldn't be there. Those worries and anxious thoughts can translate to our son. I can tell he feels it in his soul. But when I stay calm inside of myself, when I find rest for my soul through prayer and Jesus' arms, E is calm. He sleeps better too!

If I let myself get worked up, if I compare Elijah to other children, if I fight against the natural way things unfold, if I try to hurry life along, I am not in sync with God's plan for our lives. I am trying to make my own plan. I start to think I know best. 

God created time and He created the natural order of things on earth. He created a baby's sleep pattern. God created it all. 

Who am I to argue with that? 

If I sit here and preach that God is in control but I take it upon myself to force my child to sleep before his body is ready, doesn't that defeat what I preach in the first place??

This post was fueled by last night. E slept 7 straight hours. I feel rested. He appears rested. It is wonderful. Now, here is the catch 22, I do not expect him to sleep that way tonight or tomorrow night. I take each day as it comes. His body does regulate in his own time. 

I sit here thankful for last night.

In the end, when I let go of my worries and let go of the control I like to have, in time, things come together as they should. They come together as God intended. 

Proverbs 14:30

30 A calm and undisturbed mind and heart are the life and health of the body, but envy, jealousy, and wrath are like rottenness of the bones.

Philippians 4:6 

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.

Psalm 55:22

Cast your cares on the LORD and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous be shaken.

1 Peter 5:618 

6Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you at the proper time,7casting all your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you. 8Be of sober spirit, be on the alert. Your adversary, the devil, prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour.…

Galatians 6:10

Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers.

Romans 12:9

Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good.